Is ADHD a Cop Out?
Is ADHD a Copout? If you would have asked me several years ago, I would have sheepishly said yes. I simply thought it was boys who can't seem to sit still combined with a few unhealthy habits. I assumed that with a good diet, choice supplements and more time in nature, any ADD/ADHD sufferer should be fine. And maybe I still believe that can be true, but I honestly had no concept of what it even was until recently. I certainly didn't ever think it applied to more girls that we realize or, least of all, me.
What did I think about myself and my quirky brain? Ever since college, I usually felt like the world was accusing me of not working hard enough. I felt judged for my lifelong habit of losing things like keys, wallet, engagement ring - TWICE, and just about anything that used to be there but somehow found its way somewhere else. Failure has been a constant diagnosis every moment I'm faced with too much to do and not enough time to do it. Every time I have emotionally (or otherwise) hyperventilated because my routine gets thrown off by minor events, I have hated myself. The long list of unfinished projects, books and ideas bring me deep shame. My deepest desire most days? To have uninterrupted hours of time where I can dive solely into a project. I have always felt different than most, but I rarely felt like I could justify that to anyone in such a way where they wouldn't just consider me as dramatic and lazy. Never before this past year or so would I ever think all of those things combined would paint a picture of ADHD.
Did you know there are more than one types of ADHD? I didn't. Hyperactivity is only one. About a year ago I ran across the inattentive type and how women often suffer more from this one. Even then, I wasn't sure this knowledge would matter that much to me.
Below is an overview of what ADHD is:
"ADHD stands for attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. A person with ADHD has differences in brain development and brain activity that affect attention, the ability to sit still, and self-control. People with ADHD of the inattentive type have trouble paying attention to details, are easily distracted, often have trouble organizing or finishing tasks and often forget routine chores (such as paying bills on time or returning phone calls).
Executive function is the brain’s ability to prioritize and manage thoughts and actions. This ability permits individuals to consider the long-term consequences of their actions and guide their behavior across time more effectively. Individuals who have issues with executive functioning (ADHD sufferers) may have difficulties completing tasks or may forget important things." From <https://chadd.org/for-adults/overview/>
Even after a definition of terms like that, I still didn't recognize myself in those things right away. Anytime I would start to acknowledge a symptom, the voice in my head could always convince me I wasn't working smart enough or just looking for an excuse. It wasn't until I started noticing/following social media accounts that talked about ADHD in women that I truly changed my thinking on the entire subject. Everything from silly memes to serious women in industry highlighting the very things I struggle with and experience started to open my eyes to a perspective of myself I had never been given before.
ADHD isn't a cop out. Can I say that because I have years of education or clinical experience? No. Have I ever been to a doctor who has evaluated me and handed over a diagnosis? No. I am completely self-diagnosed. I feel confident in saying ADHD isn't a cop out because this new perspective has allowed me not to hate myself when I get overwhelmed and distracted. That's never happened before. I want others who might be suffering in this way to consider what ADHD is because for the first time, especially since having kids, I'm learning how to function in peace with who I am. I wish I had understood this from the beginning. I expect my daughter’s brain struggles similarly to mine. Wouldn’t you want to be able to help your child long before they have to survive on their own as an adult? I’m so thankful for this journey into new information!
Are you unsure and wondering if this is at all relevant to you or someone in your life? Follow me on Instagram where I share a lot of good information on ADHD, especially in women that can really help in understanding.